Wrestling Sub-Forum THING! Also, T-N-A! T-N-A!
And that, my friends, is called “milking it.”
However, please do partake in the really dorky discussions over at The Man Blog’s brand-spanking-new Wrestling Sub-Forum. In here, we tackle the goings-on in each of the current federations—- from the WWE, to TNA, and even to the newly-formed WSX.
And while we’re on the topic, I might as well give you four good reasons why you should also be watching TNA Wrestling. I’m not telling you to completely ditch whatever hackneyed brand of sports entertainment it is you’re currently following; all I’m saying is give this upstart company a shot, and watch at least a couple of episodes of their syndicated weekly recap show Xplosion, which airs Saturday nights at 8PM on Star World.
#1 The Knockouts.
I’m not taking anything away from the WWE Divas, in fact, more than half of the current Knockouts were picked up by TNA after they were dropped by Vince McMahon and Co. However, that was then and this is now. And now is the time for us to start massaging our crotches. Mmmmmmm.
#2 Six Sides of Steel (And Other Cockbusting Innovations!)
Their six-sided ring is special all on its own, but when you add 15-foot high steel walls on each side, you my friend are in for a special treat. Shame on me if I fail to namedrop Triple X and AMW, and their cage match from Turning Point 2004. TNA’s brand of cage match is so awesome that the company has dedicated an entire annual Pay-Per-View called Lockdown, where all the matches take place within the Six Sides of Steel.
Other original TNA matches that you should be looking out for are The King of the Mountain, Ultimate X, The House of Fun, and Elevation X, which will debut at next month’s PPV, Destination X.
That’s a lot of X’s LOLXXXORZ
#3 The No-Limits X-Division.
Think of it as TNA’s version of the cruiserweight division, only it has no weight restrictions, and is actually one bajillion times better. I swear.
The names Petey Williams, Sonjay Dutt, Jay Lethal, Austin Starr, Alex Shelley, Senshi, and Chris Sabin may not ring any bells to the average wrestling fan, but once you see them in action, you, sir/ma’am, will be shitting your pants in excitement. Just like Tom Cruise did in Born On the Fourth of July.
Here’s a little taste of what you’re missing out on (featuring the nu-metal-tastic background music from Linkin Park!):
#4 Lastly, and Most Importantly: No Bullshit, No Lame Excuses.
In TNA, titles CHANGE HANDS on account of count-outs and disqualifications. So, more often than not, we get clean and clear victors in TNA, regardless of the winner being a babyface (“the good guy”) or a heel (“the bad guy”). They’re sort of making the fake look more believable.
However, ref bumps (which is the industry term for when the referee “accidentally” gets squashed and lays motionless for 15 minutes, only to recuperate in time to make the three-count in favor of the good guy) are a staple in professional wrestling, so TNA utilizes this escape route from time to time. But that doesn’t prevent them from producing spectacular matches that will surely please wrestling enthusiasts.
