Man-Blog

Why Steel Hates Mike Villar

Editor: Steel Ventus | Section: braingasms | Email this | Viewed 594 times.

With all of the awesome humor and brilliance Mike Villar has brought upon us in the last 70 years, it’s tempting to forget that he is one dirty, dirty slutbag.

Apparently, it’s not just Bim who feels intense hatred and tainted rapture on this rising cyberspace superstar. He’s not alone in thinking that thunder is not only what he steals, but also our chances of getting laid. That’s right, Mike Villar is a licensed man-whore.

—Ade Magnaye, via Twitter

In many a night-outs we had, instead of sharing hearty laughs and pouring emotions with the rest of us, he would usually check out most of the chicks in the area, and frequently ends up getting multi-fellated at the back of an L-200. During weekends, Mikey presumably goes out alone in a bar, sweet-talking toothless women who couldn’t sell themselves for 50 bucks, getting happy-ending massages. If you look up the term skankoid in the dictionary, you won’t find Mike’s picture in it – because it’s a goddamn dictionary. There ain’t no pictures in dictionaries. But I bet the definition would include the words “Mike” and “Villar” in it.

Even Google agrees.

While we look at Mikey as the sheriff of Slutbag County, all he wants is to settle down, have some babies, and probably shop. The way I see it, I’d probably want to go with this urge I feel deep down my lumbar region to punch him in his lips, if not for them being red as ruby, and seemingly sweet as cherry. Come here, Mikey, you big grizzly bear, you!

Think Mikey’s lips are as red as a baboon’s bottom? Or your newborn baby is his? Share your thoughts via the forum. We serve up some nice laughter and warm ridicule over there.