Picking Up Women 101: Introduction and Basic Methodology

Editor: Adam Mordo | Section: the-fag-squad | Email this | Viewed 7869 times.

If you’ve been paying any attention to us you ought to know by now that The Da Vinci code isn’t worth seeing and X-Men The Last Stand is at best a mildly enjoyable action flick. Our suggestion, READ! Yep, the book at least requires you to think and we can only hope that you will take this a step further and do a bit of research on your own. The graphic novels on the other hand are mostly awesome so it’s a much safer bet. However, if by chance we ruined any of your weekend plans here is our attempt to make things right by you. We’re here to provide you with a viable alternative and that is the fine art of picking girls up. No, not that kind of pick up you dum dum. Practically anyone can buy pussy off the street. We mean the other kind, where you go to a bar and try to come home with some fine poontang for a meaningful overnight relationship. Or in the very least, score yourself a date with a hot woman.

The Prep –

Bathe. Trust me. This is not a waste of time. Although you’ve probably heard that women respond to your naturally produced pheremones, experience has proven that women prefer freshly showered to sweat stained and smelly. Deodorant is a must, specially in this weather. Cologne is also a good idea but for crissakes please avoid Brut, Jovan Musk and Axe and all other similar derivatives.

On to the clothes. The bar you plan to go to usually dictates what you’ll be wearing. As a basic rule, it’s better to be stylishly underdressed than to be garishly overdressed for anything. A nice clean button down short sleeved shirt with jeans and sneaks is a happy median, although you won’t likely standout. This isn’t a bad thing though. Choose a bar you’ve been to at least twice before. Do not go to the bar too early as this will waste all your preparation. You’ll just get all sweaty and smell like an ashtray before all the prime meat start coming in. Try to get to your destination around midnight. When all the other players are starting to look like slobs, you’ll still be looking fresh and immaculate.

Scoping the scene -

When you get to the bar, try to position yourself someplace that is relatively uncrowded and affords you a fairly good view of the playing field. Order yourself a beer and start looking for your targets. While doing so, do try not to get pissed drunk and yes, I said TARGETS. It never hurts to play the percentages. The more women you ask, the higher the likelihood that someone will say yes.

Try to look for women who are in small groups as they will generally be easier to approach. If there are more than five people in the group, look elsewhere. They are most probably more inclined to enjoy the night with their friends rather than getting laid. Likewise, avoid women who are alone as they are most probably waiting for someone or the companion is just out of sight somewhere. Keep this in mind as this could save you from a bloody nose.

Do NOT lower your standards. No woman is too pretty to take a shot at. You are not that hideous. Listen, I’m dark, not tall, far from handsome and a lot more than slightly pudgy. If i can pull this off, certainly so can you. So go ahead, go for the hottest women you can find.

The approach –

Try to spend a few minutes admiring your target from afar. If possible, try to catch her eye. If she catches you looking at her, do not look away. That my dear friend is actually your opening. Give her half a smile and then avert your gaze. Take a swig of beer and start making your way towards her. When you are close enough to carry on a conversation, introduce yourself. DO NOT FOR ANY REASON TRY OUT A STUPID PICK UP LINE. That is a sure way to crash and burn. Very very few people are capable of pulling that thing off. The best way to open up is this:

“Hi, my name is Adam. What’s your name?”

Say this with confidence and with conviction. Smile. Remember that you ARE in a bar and you are simply acting as you would be expected to act as a single guy in a bar. If you get rejected, brush it off and simply move on to the next target. Do this well enough and you would most certainly get a positive response. You’d get her name, and hopefully she’ll smile back. If this is in fact the case, follow up with:

“Are you alone? Can I get you anything?”

This sends her two very clear signals. number 1, you’re interested and number 2, you have money.

At this point, your job is to engage her in casual conversation. The key to making small talk with women is asking questions. Women as a rule, like to talk and if you present yourself as someone willing to listen, she’ll open up. Ask her if she comes to the place often. Ask her if she’s having a good night so far. Ask her opinion about the band, the crowd, the food. The other thing is to actually listen to what she’s saying as this will give you more material to prolong the conversation. For instance, if she says “the food’s ok but not exactly spectacular”, ask her what she ordered and what wasn’t right about it. If she than says, “I tried their sisig and it wasn’t bad. just not great.” reply with, “Thanks for the info. now i know what to avoid. I do know a place that serves awesome sisig. It’s nothing classy, but the sisig is to die for. Maybe i can take you there sometime” Try to throw in a few witty remarks as well. If you’re not that confident at this, do not throw in a joke because you will look as if you’re trying too hard and immediately kill the vibe you have going. Just be yourself. Be sure to ask her about herself, like what she does for a living, her hobbies and interests and stuff like that. This will be very useful later on.

Compliment her, but don’t lay it on too thick. Trying too hard just makes you look desperate and pathetic. Women don’t like desperate and pathetic. Instead, be sincere and pay attention to detail. Be specific. It’s better to say “You have an amazing smile. I really like that.” rather than “You look beautiful.” As a rule, do not compliment her on her massive mammaries or her shapely butt unless you’ve been caught staring at them, to which you will respond, “I’m sorry. They’re just too beautiful not to look at. I’m a guy after all.”

Reading the signals -

Overconfidence usually leads most guys into reading the signals wrong. Do not fall into this trap. First of all, pay attention. I cannot stress this enough. Listen to what they are saying. Listen to how they are saying it. Just because she’s agreeing to everything you say doesn’t mean she’s interested. It could be a subtle way of snubbing you into oblivion. Few things are worse than a non-commital “yeah” or “uh-huh”. If you’re getting this treatment, exit gracefully with, “Well, it was nice meeting you. Enjoy the rest of your evening.” then quickly move on to your next target. No point wasting your time with someone who is clearly not interested.

Here are a few key signs that she’s interested:

• She looks at you when you’re saying something.
• She gives real answers to your questions. The longer the answer, the better. Curt replies can mean that she’s dismissing you.
• She throws in a few questions of her own.
• She calls you by name.
• She smiles a lot. The real kind of smile. You’ve got to be a complete moron not to be able to recognize a genuine smile from a pained forced smile of utter exasperation.
• You go take a leak and she’s still there when you get back. You must be doing something right. Right?
• She calls attention to what she believes to be her best uhm, assets, for instance, touching her chest while she talks or stroking her hair or pouting and licking her lips. She does this on a subconcious level so this is a very good sign.
• She leans into you while you’re talking. Whether it’s to hear you better or to invite physical contact, you’ve more or less got it made if she does this.
• She actually makes physical contact, like touching your arm or leaning into you. If this happens you’ve almost got it made. Respond in kind by touching her back. If she doesn’t flinch, you’re in!

Closing the deal –

Invite her to momentarily step out of the bar. Say something like, “Hey, I’m gonna go outside for some fresh air, wanna come?” or “I’m just going to get a pack of smokes. Wanna come?”. This is crucial because you will need to get some place where you can be more or less alone. Keep the vibe going by asking her more about herself. Then at some point, interrupt her and say something like, “I’m sorry. But I think you’re awesome. And in about 15 seconds, I will lose all self restraint and kiss you. Please don’t let me make a fool of myself and stop me now…unless…uh, you have 7 seconds…” then start moving in for the kiss. (Count it down in your head ok? Not aloud cause that’s way too cheesy, even for me.) If she stops you, no biggie. Just laugh it off and say “Thanks. I guess I deserved/needed that” then ask her when you can call her. If she doesn’t stop you. Pause and say, “last chance” then kiss her. Getting her into the sack from there should be a cinch.

This of course is an ideal situation and will only work if you sense real chemistry or if you have luckily stumbled upon a really easy girl. In most instances, her number and a promise for a date is much easier to obtain. If this is the case, end it on a high note by referring to information you’ve obtained while talking with her, such as a common interest, (Hey, I’d love to go wall climbing with you sometime. Can I get your number so I can call you to work out the details?) or a particular place you or she mentioned, (That cafe you told me about sounds real nice. Maybe we can go there sometime. I’ll give you a call ok? What’s your number?).

If by chance you did not get any such information just go straight to the point and say, “I had a blast talking with you. I’d really love to see you again, go somewhere we can talk some more. I know this quaint little resto I’m pretty sure you’ll like. If you give me your number I’ll call you tomorrow at around 2:00PM, give you a chance to sleep in. Does that sound ok with you?” There are several factors to this closing strategy. First, you express that you had fun BECAUSE of her, which feeds her vanity which is always a good tactic when trying to get into someone’s pants. Second, you establish that you want to see her again AND get to know her even more. Third, by saying you know of a nice place to go to, you show her that you know how to think ahead and you know how to take charge, things which most women find sexy. By setting the time and date of when you’ll be calling her, you don’t have to worry about when to call her. She won’t be on pins and needles either waiting for your call. Then, you finish by showing that you care about her by making sure she get’s enough sleep.

The fine art of picking up and meeting women cannot be reduced to a hard science. As such, these tactics are not foolproof. This methodology however, has been gleaned from several years of collective experience and has a fairly high success rate. It can help increase your chances and gives you a general idea of how the whole experience should flow. There are a lot more methods to discuss and a heck of a lot more nuances to look into, but we’ll save that for later. Next time, we’ll provide you with even more ways to start a conversation, exit strategies, patterning techniques and the powerful secret of the “None Approach”. Till then, happy hunting!